This has been a very hard week for me. I have come face-to-face with insecurities I thought I had worked through. Self-doubt. (Can you really do this?) Perfectionism. (I want to know how to do it all right now and do it well.) Self-judgment. (Assessing my lack in regard to others achievement.) At that time, my day-to-day life was comfortable, and I knew what to do when each of those insecurities tried to creep into my mind and derail what I was doing or working on. Also, I learned to avoid situations or set limitations to people who were negative and/or critical. Essentially, I used the tools necessary to become the best version of myself. What I didn’t realize, is that when God calls us to higher expectations, old doubts may surface as well.
God had new plans for my life. I guess you could say I’m under construction, every day striving to be more Christ like. Getting me out of my “comfort zone” and into the realm of the unknown was the biggest challenge He has given me. It shook the very foundation I was on. Believe me when I say that I did make progress where I was and I did change for the better. But God was taking me to a new place and a new level.
“Just write what the Holy Spirit prompts you to,” I’ve told myself a lot. Got it. I can do that until the enemy steps in, “You? Technology is not your friend, remember? You don’t know your widgets from your…and besides who’s going to follow you?” Lies, lies, lies and for a short time I actually gave some of those thoughts consideration. I’m not going to lie, I got a little defeated and lost the joy God was bringing to my life through writing.
I have heard it all from the enemy this week and I have decided to fight against his condemnation in several ways:
1) I am going to fight with the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God. I am committing these particular truths to heart:
Philippians 4:13 “I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (NIV).
Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (NIV).
Colossians 3:23 “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men,” (NIV)
I need to remember Who I am working for: Jesus. As much as I would love to have a broad audience, I have to write for Him first and let Him invite those to the table that He wants to. I need to rely solely on Him and keep Him first in all I do.
2) JOY!! “I’ve got the joy, joy, joy down in my heart, Where? Down in my heart…” (Child bible songs). Do you remember that song? In my prayer time yesterday, God placed it on my heart to meditate on it and I decided to take it one step further. I wrote Joy, in red, on the inside of my left wrist as a daily reminder. Writer’s block? JOY! Indecisive teenager at home? JOY! Widgets and technology problems? JOY! Joy above all circumstances and emotions because joy is a central part of our spiritual salvation and personal relationship with Jesus. Luke writes, in Acts 2:28, “You have made known to me the paths of life; you fill me with joy in your presence” (NIV).
3)Keep on, keeping on. You know what? I do not know it all. My writing will not be perfect. I have so much to learn. I am committing what I do to the Lord every day, seeking Him first and asking the holy spirit to guide me. Also, every day I plan to work on something new and develop the skills necessary to complete what God started in me. 🙂 I love, love this quote from Steve Harvey:
“The higher you climb there’s going to be opposition. New level, new devil. Just keep rolling and pushing through. What God has for you is yours if you don’t quit before the finish line” (Pinterest).
Thank you, thank you for being on this journey with me. We are all learning and growing together, which is why God wants us to share stories and fellowship with each other. Love you guys! It wouldn’t be an awesome ending if I didn’t share a song with you. Casting Crowns, Voice of Truth. Listen here.
All the glory to God. ~ Shanon
Casting Crowns, “Voice of Truth.” You tube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwsvqVmFV6Y
“God at work construction tape.” Fun Express.com. https://www.funexpress.com/god-at-work-construction-zone-tape-13743109.html
“I’ve got the Joy in my heart.” Child Bible Songs. http://childbiblesongs.com/song-04-ive-got-the-joy-in-my-heart.shtml
Ministry Quotes. Steve Harvey. Pinterest. https://www.pinterest.com/pin/235735361719480813/
Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.